this song is seen as the final nail in the coffin for the twin fantasy storyline that started with the album 3. the song's length may be daunting, however, it keeps your attention the entire time through it's multiple sections and excellently crafted lyrics. (click to view) this song begins with the line "i'm not hung up on you anymore, but here's why i hung up." this line details what the song is going to be about and already let's the listener in on will's masterclass songwriting. he follows up with the line "behind every great love story, lies a great suicide." this tells the reader that the relationship that we are about to be told about was one of tragedy and sorrow and that it didn’t end in anything positive. it also eludes to famous writers who have wrote tragic romances that have ended in suicide, such as romeo and juliet. the next 2 lines build upon the idea of suicide by stating that giving yourself up completely for love is a suicide of sorts, showing that people cannot be 100% invested in a relationship with their body and soul in without sacrificing their being in the process. will’s next 4 lines creates a very clever metaphor about the contrast between the things he truly wants to say/ his intentions to what he actually conveys to his partner, a commonality in a lot of csh songs and details that will’s inner intentions are not aligned with what he says. the next verse starts off introducing the listener to how truly toxic the relationship is, by stating “the unending realization that it’s never gonna end.” which represents the cycle of pain that this toxic relationship inflicted upon both parties and how the cycle continued on for a long duration of time without any remediation which damaged both the people in the process. the next lines reference songs from his album prior to this, monomania, which was the part of the twin fantasy story that detailed the breakup and will’s post-relationship grief personified by intense frustration and anger with the other person and also uses these lines to show that they were never really meant for each other in the first place because will’s strength was never “living underwater” and the partner lives “in the depths.. where the sun never sinks.” indicating that will cannot survive in the water (a metaphor for his partner) and that his partner lives in the water all the time. the next verse shows will beginning to completely let go of his relationship and idealism of the partner. the line “i’ll burn all the promises i carved out of your woulds” shows that will is beginning to let go of everything the partner said to him and all the false promises that were made to him and he is finally beginning to heal and let go. he also uses the word would as a homophone for the word wood since you carve wood and they sound the same. the next 4 lines personifies the danger of complete dependence on another person and ties back to the idea of “committing yourself completely” to suicide. he does this by recommending to the partner that he should “abandon your clothes and modes of speech” and if he does this (committing his entire self to the relationship) he will become “an infant reborn” and will be “helpless and afraid”. through these lines he shows that if you do become so dependent on a relationship and on a person that you have basically given up your entire being, you will become reborn as a helpless and afraid person since the person will inevitably leave you because of your immense dependence on them. this line really hits home, fuck you will toledo. the next line shows will’s contrasting emotions he felt during his relationship, on one hand he says bye to his lover every time they go out to the store, but on the other hand, his relationship is so toxic that he hopes the lover breaks his hand when he slams the door. the next lines, will talks about how he burned himself trying to light a cigarette for his lover, personifying how he stopped caring about himself entirely to focus all of his care to his partner. in verse 5, will starts off by saying “i’d hate to amputate this artificial limb” which tells the listener that the relationship is completely over by this point and is just being fabricated by the both of them, but in reality there is no love to be salvaged. he then questions his belief by saying that his glass eyes are growing dim because he doesn’t know whether or not he’s lying to himself about the relationship or if it is truly over and is just being played out. the next lines, he talks about how his lover’s infectious personality caused him to become addicted to the person (dependent), but now he is going to move and gain some space for himself and begin to regain himself. on verse 6 he begins by talking about how they never kissed on the mouth because the relationship truly wasn’t as will believed it was and that will put in so much effort while the partner just put as minimum effort as they could to continue the relationship. the line “you held the north while i conquered the south” personifies this and is also more directly about 69’ing showing that will put effort into the sexual relations while the partner just did the bare minimum to get pleasure. will then says that he “want you to fuck me in my sleep, it’s the only way i’ll ever know that you love me.” showing that the partner, when conscious does not really care about will or buries it too deep for it to be noticeable by will, but when the partner is unconscious that is the only time will feels like he gets anything truly special out of the relationship he cares so deeply about. on verse 7, he uses the metaphor of killing a werewolf with silver bullets to talk about his relationship. he was ready to kill the werewolf (end the relationship) but his lover distracted him until morning so the beast was no longer a beast. this caused will to give up on trying to end it and just endured the toxicity for a much longer time than healthy for a human being to take. will then says his partners strategies for prolonging the relationship that the partner doesn’t even care about will not work on anyone else since will has been “recording the whole fucking thing” because now his partners sins are completely on the surface and cannot be replicated at all. verse 8 starts off talking about why will endured this pain for so long, because he wants the sex and the pleasure that he gets from their relationship so he has to endure the pain that comes with being in the toxic situation. the way he describes this idea is completely fucking beautiful, stating that, “if i’m not getting fucked over, i’m not getting fucked at all.” he then admits that he had part in the ruining of the relationship, but then adds that atleast he admits the fact that he did while the partner is still oblivious and ignores the crimes they committed to the relationship. he then talks about how he hates what he did for trying to find someone he likes. this line is a double entendre, however, because he both hates himself for trying to get someone alike him and he just hates himself and found someone who also hates themselves which automatically created a relationship of discrepancies built on dependence on one another. verse 9 starts off talking about how his lover is making it “hard to talk about the past” and also will not talk about current issues with will aswell, as though the partner “copyrighted the present”. on verse 10, will talks about how his partner and him both “attended parties alone” showing that they both felt very distant even in their relationship and felt like they werent even together because they practically avoided each other while still saying they were in a relationship together. however, will talks to his partner on the phone to try to connect them together and then recognizes the moon as a thing that they can both share even though they are not together since the moon is a thing that everyone can see no matter where you are, however, his lover says “i’m inside.” as a response because his lover does not want to share shit with will and does not have any interest in creating a new connection between the two. after this bomb is dropped, verse 11 begins with will saying he is going to try to love again even though this relationship ended in failure and his partner is going to live alone (isolate themselves) and then they’ll meet together and compare their progress of their plans of healing. will then mumbles about how he only has bitterness left so he will be the “best at being bitter” about this relationship. the second part of the song is titled “what joe’s baby said” idk why it’s titled that but it’s titled that lol. will starts off talking about how he goes to a receptionist to see his partner, but his partner’s receptionist doesn’t let him see his partner and lies that his partner is not there. however, will doesn’t care and will wait for his partner for however long it takes for his partner to come back. will cannot move on from this relationship. will then questions himself about why he even wrote this 16 minute song at all if nobody is gonna care to hear about it (i care tho will dont worry this song is probably the greatest song ever made). will then exclaims that he’s not gonna give his account of his relationship with any room for interpretability and will make it so it is understood by everyone and there are no questions left to be asked. will then talks about his partner being a “gentle cannibal” and saying that his partner will “eat you softly” showing that their relationship was eating at will and practically killing him, but so slowly that the toxicity kept building up and webbed him into a shape where he could no longer escape at all. finally, we get to the chorus, where will starts off by saying his lover is “taking advice from lady macbeth”, a character in shakespere’s novel ‘macbeth’ who manipulated her husband into committing murder. he does this to directly say that his lover is being manipulative and causing will turmoil to do things he doesn’t want to do, putting the toxicity of the relationship on full display. will then says that it is it out of his hands so all he can do is forget about the relationship entirely. he also uses wordplay to elude to the story of herold the great and mariamne, the wife of herold who was executed on the grounds of treason and infidelity, a decision that herold would regret. he does this to personify his relationship as the tragic story of herold and mariamne because will regrets ending the relationship and wants his lover back, despite all the turmoil that the relationship caused originally. will then says “whoever you are, just hold me tight, i lost my love, my life that night.” saying that his entire being was erased by the end of his relationship because he committed too much of himself to the relationship to the point where he had to start from 0 and just is in need of intimacy and comforting during this time. will then ties back again to the idea that the relationship was killing the both of them by saying that one of them was supposed to kill the other. but will contradicts this by saying that “murder is dirty and peace is cheap”. this shows that will chose to end the relationship on his own pretenses and is leaving it with no strings attached and no bitterness so that he wont be figuratively killed again like last time. the final part of the song, only available on bandcamp because of it’s copyright, repeats the lines from the song “down by the river” by neil young, to continue upon the ideas of the relationship killing someone by saying that “i shot my baby down by the river”. holy fuck this song is so fucking good it makes me feel so many emotions. it is a masterclass in songwriting and the song that solidifed will toledo as my vote for the greatest songwriter ever. this song personifies everything that will built up in the twin fantasy saga starting all the way in 2010 with 3, to 2011’s twin fantasy, 2012’s monomania, and finally this song, appearing on will’s clustered album, ‘nervous young man’. listen to the song right here (click this).
this song is the final track on bcnr’s opus of an album, ‘ants from up there’ and serves to close out the story of love and dependency that was presented before us. the lyrics can be found here (click here). this song starts off with a slow buildup of instruments starting with the bass until every instrument is playing in tangent, creating a sense of awakening in the song. this goes on for 3 minutes until isaac begins singing. the first line of the song, “concorde flies around my room, tears the house to shreds” references a clever extended metaphor from the entire album, relating to the concorde jet which represents the failing relationship that isaac is in. the fact that it was tearing the house to shreds shows that the relationship was destroying the places he thought to be the most safe and private and that this relationship is encapsulating his very being and is constantly on his mind. the line, ‘defines the night as such’ shows how the relationship destroys and ruins his night constantly because his thoughts are always lingering about what could’ve been and what isaac could’ve done better instead of him looking positively to the future. the next lines ‘a home for us, stick insects’ refers to how the night is defined as a place for small and invisible insects showing that he feels completely invisible and like nothing after this relationship finished. this plays into the themes of immense dependency on a partner and telling the listener through convoluted metaphors that dependency leads to negative and fatal thoughts in a person and will always result in the destruction of said relationship. this is followed up by the line ‘and leaves no trace for luck at every market town that we intersect’ because it shows that isaac’s search for a replacement partner is to no evail because of how much he loved this partner and now the backlash of his invisibility (being a stick insect) is causing him to not be able to find this love he so much desires. the line ‘i die like 15 times’ represents how isaac’s mental state is declining heavily because of this relationship and that every night he dies because of how much this relationship ending fucked him up. it cleverly shows isaac’s mental state without explicit lyrics citing anything. the song then begins verse 2 after a much more upbeat quick instrumental part. verse 2 of part 1 has a much more hopeful attitude than verse 1 and shows that isaac is changing for the better despite how his relationship turned out and messed him up. the first line, ‘train rides don’t hurt much these days’, show that isaac is beginning to get back on his feet and he’s beginning to be able to do stuff as a normal person without the crippling depression from his relationship eating at him constantly. the next lines, ‘we’re all working on ourselves and we’re praying that the rest don’t mind how much we’ve changed.’ isaac’s beginning to care for himself over the needs of others and beginning to truly love himself which is one of the first steps an individual must take to heal from codependency, but he hopes his friends don’t recognize anything different and don’t have the same relationship as he did with his ex where they will leave him once he gains independence and starts caring for himself. it shows a conflicting viewpoint from isaac about change being good and bad. the next 2 lines, ‘so if you see me looking strange with a fresh style, i’m still not doing that great’, show that isaac is trying his hardest to keep positive and change so that his codependency doesn’t keep eating at him, but he can’t stop lingering thoughts and that he hasn’t fully recovered from the issue, cited by the second line where he says he’s still not doing that great. the lines ‘and then it’s in soft focus all around you, you can’t see the football game.’ show that their relationship and experiences are taking center stage and that everything else is secondary to them right now. however, this line is followed up by ‘on my dad’s sofa, we are still, and we never look at our phones anymore’ which could mean that isaac was still thinking about a memory or thinking about a scenario that hasn’t happened and that they still do not have contact (seen by them not looking at their phones anymore) showing that their relationship may be beyond repair and it is still killing isaac despite his hopeful demeanor. part 2 starts after an instrument break that builds up a very large crescendo that instantly crashes into a guitar riff, showing that isaac was on the break of mental disarray but recollected himself. the next lines, ‘oh i can’t think of anything better, pick a hair off my sweater and drown in me, like boyfriend jeans’ show that isaac is willing to change his fashion for his partner as boyfriend jeans are a fashion trend where women alter their partner’s clothing to their liking to make it better, showing that isaac will change his clothing to modify it entirely just for a chance to get his partner to notice him. the lines, ‘oh i haven’t felt this way in like ever, i am the convo, you are the weather’ represent that all isaac talks about is her because in small-talk people tend to talk about dull things like the weather, but for isaac he is the convo and she is the weather, meaning that she encapsulates his very being and is all he thinks about all the time. the line ‘and the clamp is a cracked smile cheek, and it tortures me’ paints a picture of a smile being forced by a clamp buit is damaged because a clamp is too rough to create a genuine smile, showing that isaac is keeping up a positive façade, when in reality his thoughts about this lover are completely torturing him in his entirety and making him miserable. another instrumental begins after these lines are repeated again and the instrumental is characterized by a very abrasive drum and looping guitar riff playing, this drum may show that isaac’s heart is bursting and beating very loudly as he is about to spill his true emotions all out after his constant need for a facade in the second part. the 3rd part begins with, ‘in my bed sheets now wet, of charlie i pray to forget’, which i believe this line is showing that isaac is constantly thinking of this person and it is causing him to have disturbing reactions (such as wet dreams) even though he so desperately wants to and needs to forget this person because they are causing immense emotional turmoil for him. the delivery on this part is actually mesmerizing because it is filled with complete and utter emotion. it is followed up by the line, ‘all i’ve been forms the drone, we sing the rest’ describes that isaac is taking most of the responsibility in the relationship he was in and did the most to try to get the partner to care about him while all they contributed was a tiny bit, while still being aided by isaac. this shows that isaac has put immense care into this relationship but his partner doesn’t care and his efforts were ultimately fruitless. the next line, ‘oh your generous loan to me, your crippling interest.’ is one of the most heartbreaking lines of anything i have ever heard. it shows that his partner fakes their care for him just to entertain him temporarily and they make a big deal out of it. it also shows that the person is trying to play a moral highground that doesn’t exist as they are considering the fact that they even listen to isaac to be such a massive ordeal and a massive showing of generosity, when in actuality it is a normal thing people should offer in a relationship. this line is repeated 3 times in this verse, with the emotion and vulnerability in isaac’s voice increasing with each repeat, showing that isaac is becoming desperate and is beginning to breakdown because of the relationship that was lost and how much he wasted into someone who didn’t care for him that much in actuality. it is a sad realization that isaac makes which is described by the increasing emotion in his voice. this song ends with a feint screaming in the background and complete chaos from all the instruments playing at once, showing that isaac is having a breakdown by the end of the song. overall, this song may be one of the greatest things in human history as throughout the song it displays some of the most impressive instrumentation in history as well as some of the greatest lyricism in history, through isaac’s use of exceedingly clever metaphors that help paint a more abstract but also nuanced picture of the relationship that this album and song are about. you can listen to this track here (click here).
this song details will's innate desires of relationships and his disappointment/boredom with life. the lyrics can be found here (click here). he starts the song off with an allusion to the beatles song 'a day in the life' except choosing to use the words, 'woke up, had a boner, dragged a comb across my boner.' now this lyric is kind of out there and funny but my interpretation of it is that will is using these bored words to say that he is bored of the life he is currently in but chooses to talk about a boner because of the fact that he desires for a relationship and a connection with someone to the point that he subconciously dreams about it. the next line, 'i said it's time to experience high tide', is will saying that he wants to experience something greater and he is bored of just the mundanity of his single life and wants to elevate it by being in a relationship with the person this song is about. the next two lines, "no thanks, i don't drink, and oh god. are you drunk? what you've done, this vibrato isn't helping things much." is will having second thoughts about this person as they have qualities that are not favorable to will and is considering mundanity as the only result at this place in life. the next lines, "no one should trust my statement of faith, 'cause i didn't make eye contact and i kept touching my face." represents will's dishonesty about the things he says and that he isn't confident about what he believes it and what he thinks about himself and others (presumably the subject of the song). this shows that will is still contemplative about relationships as a whole and what he thinks about this person. the chorus starts which repeats the line, "be honest, but not that honest." this shows will's hypocrisy because will himself is not honest about what he's saying seen by the lines preceding this and it also shows that will is afraid of the whole truth and only wants the part of the truth that this indvidiual thinks that will wants to hear. verse 2 begins with the lines, "i think i know where the bathrooms are here. i've been going to this restaurant for what, 17 years?" i believe this line represents that will has lived in one place all of his life and is tired of the boredom as well as he has known this person for so long that he knows the ins and outs of what they do, and uses the metaphorical bathroom and restuarant to represent his dormancy in one place. the next lines, "for a minute there, i thought you were twice as tall as me." show that will deals with insecurity and has placed his partner on a pedastal, if only for a minute, and he believes he is inferior and undeserving of this person becuase they are so much taller than him in his head. the next lines, "you're no spencer and i'm no dan, but together we'll sound like wolf parade as best as we can." is talking about dan and spencer from the indie rock band 'wolf parade' and will uses this line to convey that him and his partner may not be perfect but together they will try their hardest to create a fruitful and meaningful relationship for the both of them. he then repeats the line about his partner being twice as tall as him. next is the second chorus that changes the lines from the original chorus to be, "not that honest, we'll be honest." which i believe will is succumbing to the idea of a relationship but their trust for each other is misconstrued and they both don't truly trust each other as much as they could and just try to please one another with the things that they tell each other. this is showing signs of a broken relationship from the get-go and that this relationship really wont be as meaningful as the lines before were trying to portray. the next lines of the bridge are, "you said, 'why don't you just grab the brush from davinci and tell him how he could be doing it better.' i said, 'you're supposed to call him leonardo!' i believe these lines show that his partner has geniune criticisms of will that will be the downfall of the relationship and will is being negligent to this person's criticisms and goes back to his old habits that his partner was criticizing in the first place. this shows will's inability to change to be a better person which segways into the next lines of, "i wish i was a kid with an adult boyfriend." i believe these lines are will saying he wants the pleasure and the benefit of being in an adult relationship but doesn't want to have to do any of the work to change and be more mature himself, which continues the idea that will has an inability to change to a better person. this is repeated for a couple of lines and then finishes with the line, "i wish i was dead" which is just as it sounds. it shows that will knows he cannot change and doesn't want to change but he knows he has to or nothing will work out in his favor. he decides he would rather die then have to put in the work to change and thinks that death would be the better escape from his own inability to change. this song is deeply cathartic and discusses many different relatable themes. you can listen to this song here here (click here
sorry for doing another csh song but this band has probably the greatest lyricism of all time so i’m actually not sorry and fuck you because these songs are great. today we will be going over the 2011 version of csh’s titular song ‘beach life-in-death’ from twin fantasy. this song is the best song on the 2011 version and the second best on the 2018 version. but today, we will be looking at the lyrics through the guise of 2011 and without the 2018 version in mind. this song details many things ranging from homosexuality, to unrequited love, to will’s battle with mental illness. the song starts off with a quick opening into the lyrics, “last night i drove to harper’s ferry and i thought about you.” this opens the song up with an immediate description of will’s feelings and his unrequited and constantly ruminating feelings of love for the person he is thinking about. he then follows it up with the lines “there were signs on the road that warned me of stop signs.” which may both reference the fact that his mind was telling him to stop thinking about this person and just get over them entirely or it’s describing that will’s homosexual feelings towards someone would be shunned by society so he subconsciously wants to stop them. the next lyrics, “the speed limit kept decreasing by ten, as we entered a town about halfway there.” shows that will and his lover decided to slow down with the speed at which they were coming to a relationship and decided to meet at somewhere closer than friends but less than lovers. the next line, “it was almost raining at the train station, we put our hoods on our heads at the train station.” show that him and his lover, by this point, were experiencing joy together and experiencing things that will cherishes and loves deeply. this is continued with the lines, “i threw rocks into the river, the river underneath the traintracks.” however, on the next lines, “and when the train came it was so big and powerful, when it came into the little station, i wanted to put my arms around it. but the conductor looked at me funny.” this line is an obvious metaphor for sex as the train is obviously will’s lover and the little station is him. and in this sex, will would like to display a deeper intimacy with his lover and hug them and embrace their warmth and love, however, maybe because of his lovers apprehension because of societal norms against being gay or because his lover doesn’t truly love him back, there is no true connection made during the sex and the sex ultimately becomes just pointless intercourse. the next lines, “so we had to say goodbye and leave, the monopoly boards still in the backseat” represent that will did not successfully create the connection he truly desired for and that he lusted for so deeply, however, there is still a reason to come back to this person, seeing as he left “a monopoly board” with the person, so it shows there is still something there, just not a deep connection. the next line follows up with, “took that nightmare left turn to get out of town, ran into the decreasing speed limits again.” so i believe the first part is an actual reference to a turn where he lives since idk what else it could be but the second part continues will’s anxiety about the social normality of being gay because he is slowing down and is psyching himself out of getting what he truly wants because of fear of being judged. the next lines are very repetitive, but for good reason, being “what should i do? eat breakfast. what should i do? eat lunch. what should i do? eat dinner. what should i do? go to bed. what should i do? go to the store. what should i do? apply for jobs. what should i do? go to a friend’s. what should i do? go to bed.” i believe these lines are will expressing his boredom with the monotony of life and showing his inherent desires for something more real and something more true and something more deep, which he believes he finds in this person. the next lyrics, “i wrote ‘beach death’ when i thought you were taken. i wrote ‘beach funeral’ when i knew you were taken. i wrote ‘beach fagz’-well it wasn’t about you, but it could’ve been. well, no it couldn’t have.” these lines are references to previous songs in will’s discography, and all are about unrequited love, though not all about the same person. they show that this person, (and others) have been on will’s mind for a long time and he has been distraught over his deep longing for intimacy with these people. the next lyrics, “i spent a week in ocean city, and came back to find you were gone.” shows that he finds out that his lover is now pursuing their dreams and has presumably found someone they can be intimate with, which leaves will seeming alone in his small town in virginia. the next lines, “ i spent a week in illinois, and came back to find you were still gone.” shows that will is still waiting on this person and hoping that they go back to the small town and that their dreams fail so he can see them and reignite the flame that was there. the next part starts with, “i pretended i was drunk when i came out to my friends, i never came out to my friends. we were all on skype.” this line shows that will was so afraid of his own identity and anxious about the social perceptions and social repercussions of it that he decided that he was going to lie about his identity and play it off as him being drunk or a joke, it shows one of the many themes of this song of will’s anxiety about his own identity and how it scares him to be like this and accept who he is against a society that is pushing back against him. the next lines “and i laughed and i changed the subject. she said, ‘what’s with this dog motif?’ i said, ‘do you have something against dogs?’ ” continues will’s denial and social anxiety about his identity, but also shows one of the other things that will was anxious about which is furry stuff and anthro stuff and he get’s defensive and snaps at the person about it in an anxious reaction. the next lines, “i am almost completely soulless, i am incapable of being human, i am incapable of being inhuman, i am living uncontrollably.” show that will is dealing with depression to the point where he feels completely empty and ‘soulless’, it also describes his feeling of alienation from the people around him because of his identity issues and that he believes himself to be weird to the point where he is something that isn’t human but is. the next lines, “it should be called anti-depression, as a friend of mine suggested. because it’s not the sadness that hurts you, it’s the brain’s reaction against it.” gives an explicit and fantastic detail about how depression affects the mentally ill, detailing that the sadness of things doesn’t hurt you, but it’s your brain and the way it reacts to certain things that makes you feel in such a way and destroys you to the point where you can be classified as an individual with depression. the next lines, “it’s not enough to love the unreal, i am inseparable from the impossible” show that will has deluded himself with his fantasies of his idealized lover in his head and shows that he cannot get out of his head and see the reality of life, and only sees the impossible scenarios in his mind. the next lines, “i want gravity to stop for me, my soul yearns for a fugitive from the laws of nature.” shows will’s inherent desire to be considered something by someone and his desire to be special as an explanation for his differences and alienation. he wants to be someone who the laws of nature don’t apply with so he can consider himself special not just because of his sexual identity and his inclination to anthro-fiction. the next lines, “i want a cut-scene, i want a cut from your face to my face, i want a cut, i want the next related video.” i dont know abt this honestly i think it might be an allusion to him wanting to be basically the same as his lover or an allusion to self harm but idk lol. this follows up with, “i don’t want to go insane. i don’t want to have schizophrenia.” i believe this is will acknowledging that he wants to get better and does not want to meet the same fate as some of those he looks up to and does not want to break under his mental illness and the pressure of reality. the next lines, “the ocean washed over your gave [x2]”, as stated by will represents the desire to repress feelings and emotions related to someone, but they keep springing back up, like the ocean washing over something. this is when part 2 of the song begins and starts off with, “last night, i dreamed he was trying to kill you. i woke up and i was trying to kill you.” this represents that will is being overprotective and worries too much about this person, to the point where he himself ends up hurting them in the process. the next lines, “it’s been a year since we first met, i don’t know if we’re boyfriends yet.” are pretty self-explanatory and continue the idea that will was in a place less than lovers but more than friends with this person and that the both of them are hesitant to define things as it is scary and anxiety inducing to be in relationships in your teenage years. the next lines, “do you have any crimes left that we can use to pass the time? i am running out of drugs to try.” shows will’s desire for something out of monotony, he wants to do something beyond the boundaries of what society would consider okay and normal, he wants to be free from society’s normality. the next lines, “we said we hated humans, we wanted to be humans [x2]”, continues this theme under new pretenses. it shows him and his lover both desired the disconnect from society, but deeply, they just wanted to fit in in a world where they naturally just didn’t do so, so they decided to reject it in its entirety as a coping mechanism so they don’t have to face the reality of them not fitting in. the next lines, “get more groceries, get eaten [x3]” show will’s continued depression and his lack of appreciation for his mundanity and monotony of his life that he experiences throughout this song. all he believes he does is a continued cycle of consuming until there’s nothing left, and then resupplying. he believes there is nothing interesting or worthwhile that life can offer to him looking through his eyes of depression. the next verse of part 2 starts off with, “a book of aubrey beardsley art corrupted me in youth, now i’m trapped inside my youth, and you’re in love with late-stage youth.” i believe this line entails how his youth was corrupted with the hypersexual nature of aubrey beardsley’s aesthetic movement art and how it pushed the boundaries of depicting the tabboo and sexual nature of life. this caused him to be stuck in his ideation of sex that his youth was corrupted by, showing that he could not move on to a position of maturity. however, his lover, likes late stage youth because it depicts a childish immaturity when it comes to sex and possibly makes sex more interesting and exciting for the other partner. the next lines, “thank god for the little things, and fuck god that they’re little things.” is one of my favorite lines in the history of music. it shows will’s inner battle with himself about his appreciation for life and what it is and his desire for something more real and abnormal. he wishes that these things were not just little things and that he could experience them for eternities because they are the only things in his life that induce a feeling of intangible happiness. the next lines, “i am running out of prayers to sing and i…” show that will is at a breaking point and is feeling eternally hopeless. he feels lost. he feels negligible to society. he feels like he is at a point where he has nothing else to hold on to and is about to go so far over the edge that he falls over it. this depicts people with depression almost insanely accurately and is one of the only songs that truly depicts that feeling in such a vivid nature. the next lines, “and pretty soon, you’ll find some nice, young, satanist with braces and one- capital ‘O’ significant ‘Other’ and you can take him home to your mother, and say, ‘ma, this is my brother.’ ” this line depicts will’s innate desire to be intimate with someone who is like him, to the point where they are not just anything but brothers. he wants to find someone who is so much like him that he can fade himself into their own identity, so he can escape his sadness and loneliness. he needs some sort of connection to latch himself onto so he can bring meaning into his own self. this leads into the chorus where it repeats the lines from earlier, “we said we hated humans, we wanted to be humans [x2]” and i already explained that so for the sake of time i will not do that again. same with the next lines, “get more groceries, get eaten [x3]”. then comes to the outro of part 2 of the song where it says, “by the one you love, when they put their lips around you, you can feel their smile from the inside.” this shows that will has achieved his dire need for a connection that he has been longing for. he has fulfilled his goal and he is satisfied. but, on the rails of this, the third part begins. it starts off with the line, “last night, i dreamed he was trying to kill you, i woke up and i was trying to kill you.” which i already explained so lets skip that and go onto the next line which is, “your ears perked up, i perked up when your ears perked up.” which is representing the said, dog motif from earlier and also represents his shared passion for anthromorphism with his lover. the next lines, “and i hoped it was for me, i hoped you were using your sonar systems for me.” will is absolutely desperate for this person’s attention, he desires it so deeply to the point where he craves it. he wants to be recognized by no one except for this person. he wants this person to put all their focus on him. the next lines, “the ancients saw it coming, you can see that they tried to warn us. with the tales that they told their children, but they fell out of their heads in the morning.” shows that throughout history, people warned about the dangers of love and the dangers of intimacy, but it always had fell on empty ears, just like how it fell on empty ears with will. the next lines continue this with, “they said that sex can be frightening, but the children were not listening, and the children cut out everything, except for the kissing and the singing.” which continues will’s belief that sexual intimacy is a danger for people that falls on everyone with loose ears. nobody really believes in this danger and thus chooses pleasure over divinity. the next lines, “when they finally found their homies at walt disney studios, and then everyone grew up, with their fundamental schemas fucked”, represents the fact that in disney movies, they portray life in a certain unrealistic way that is contrary to the way we actually go about and live our lives. this creates a deeply ingrained lie in the hearts of everyone that they believe their life is going to be like a disney movie, and are sorely disappointed when it turns out to not be that way. “but, but, but, there are lots of fish left in the sea. there are lots of fish in business suits, that talk and walk with human feet, and visit doctors, have weak knees.” which i believe this line shows that, even though his lover may not have the affection for him that he was led to believe, he still has so many other fish in the sea. he also decided to anthropomorphize the fish as maybe a deep down longing for this certain person who also shares a love for anthropomorphism or because it is one of the things that he deeply connects with. the next lines, “oh please, let me join your cult. i’ll paint my face in your colors.” represent will’s desire to be apart of something and feel like he fits into something. this is a reoccuring theme throughout the song as he battles with anxiety and identity issues and depression. he is willing to give up on even his humanity and join a cult that truly doesn’t care about him just to feel like he is someone who fits in. the next lines, “you had a real nice face, i had an early death.” show that will believes himself to be negligible when it comes to his lover. he can’t truly let go of this person because he believes this person is his raison d’etre and his muse. he needs this person or else he will sprial into an even deeper depression. he will essentially, as he states himself, have an ‘early death.’ the next part is a repeating of the line, “the ocean washed over your grave.” a bunch of times which i already covered. this is the end of the song. this song is one of the greatest hallmarks in songwriting history and is also a great use of sonic expression and lofi rock overall. it shows will’s creativity and ambition and how he uses his low funding as a strength in his music to deliver a higher quality of honesty. i love this song. thank you for reading.